#329 Get Set Up on a Blind Date By My Friends
A couple I know told me a few weeks ago that they wanted to set me up with one of their friends. Being set up is a very tricky proposition. Especially when you’re trying to setup your friends. To be honest, I don’t know why people feel the need to embark down that road. Well, I know the optimistic reasons. It’s always great when friends end up dating because then it just makes it easier to hang out with people. And if a couple creates another couple, then it’s double dates galore.
The problem is, it’s more likely not to work out. You’ve got a potentially sticky situation where it could be awkward forever between the two people being setup. Then it has the opposite reaction where the couple can’t hang out with both individuals at the same time. In short, it becomes a giant clusterfuck.
I’ve been setup before… by my mother. This was about six years ago or so. My mother and her friend in New Jersey decided that her daughter who also lived in LA would be the perfect match for me. I obliged my mother to be polite and because I figured, why not? The girl in question turned out to be nice enough but there was no romantic spark. Later, I discovered the girl had yelled at her mother for setting her up with someone “so young.” I was confused and asked my mother how old the girl was. She said “32.” I was 30 at the time but look young for my age so maybe she thought I was 25. Still, why would she get so MAD? It’s not like I was 12. That was the first and last time I was going to let my mother stick her nose in my love life.
But these couple friends of mine seemed so sure we’d be a match. So despite my reservations (and yes, fear) I decided to give it a shot.
The couple suggested we do a double date. I vetoed that idea quickly. Double dates aren’t really dates. It’s hard to get to know somebody that way. I suggested we get dinner alone and then met up with the couple afterwards. They agreed.
I met Tracy at Lou, a wine bar/restaurant I’ve been meaning to try out for awhile. I got there early which I always like to do for dates. It gives me time to relax and get comfortable before being thrown headlong into the inevitable painfully awkward small talk.
Tracy arrived soon after. Having friends in common can be a good thing. It made me feel more at ease than I normally would have. But I made sure not to talk about them too much during the meal. We made a couple of jokes about the couple but for the most part, talked about each other. It can be a trap to just talk about the friends you have in common because it’s easy. But ultimately a complete waste of time.
While she did know about SYED, she said she didn’t really read it because she wanted to get to know me like a normal person (my words not hers). I liked that. It’s hard enough to not Facebook stalk someone you’re being setup with. It’s a whole other thing not to read the online brutally honest ramblings of someone you’re being setup with.
We inevitably talked about the blog though. While I do enjoy talking about it, part of me wonders if that’s the only thing I can talk about anymore. Then again, the blog is what I do most of the time. What else would I talk about? How much I hate work? Playing video games?
Luckily, Tracy turned out to be a pretty cool girl. The conversation went well and there weren’t any “oh God why are we both here” moments. She also didn’t excuse herself to go to the bathroom and attempt to climb out the window. Or maybe she did but realized the bathrooms didn’t have windows. Joke’s on her!
We met up with our couple friends after dinner. When Tracy left to go to the bathroom, I knew they would immediately ask what I thought of her and they didn’t disappoint. I was diplomatic and just said we had fun which we did. But I didn’t say anything more than that.
At the end of the night, I had a feeling that we both felt like there wasn’t a romantic connection. I think we were both mature enough that it wouldn’t be awkward in the future if we were to cross paths again. The whole setup went as well as it could short of us having a romantic connection.
But I think I’m done being setup for awhile. I’m also done on OKCupid. I’m going to try and meet girls the old fashioned way: go to bars at 1:40am and look for the drunkest ones.
